Page:Fugitive Poetry 1600-1878.djvu/544
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THE ONE-LEGGED GOOSE.
Though Peg, poor girl, was rather vexed
At this unlooked-for sad disaster,
She was not quite so much perplexed
As you may think: she had been used to gull
The squire, and knew the thickness of his skull;
And, consequently, to this conclusion fell—
They who could do a goose so well,
Would not be troubled much to do her master.
At this unlooked-for sad disaster,
She was not quite so much perplexed
As you may think: she had been used to gull
The squire, and knew the thickness of his skull;
And, consequently, to this conclusion fell—
They who could do a goose so well,
Would not be troubled much to do her master.
Home came the squire, to the moment true,
And rang for dinner in a hurry;
She browned the mutilated side anew,
And put it on the table in a flurry.
Soon as it met his eye, the squire
Exclaimed with wonderment and ire,
"Why, what do you call this, Peg?
Where, where, girl! where is the other leg?"
Peg curtsied and replied, in modest tone,
"An't please you, sir, it never had but one!"
"Only one leg! Where did you buy it, pray?"
"At Parmer Grain's, sir, across the way;
And if to-night, sir, you will go with me,
I'll pledge my life that you shall see
A number of the farmer's geese,
Which, like this bird, have only one a-piece."
And rang for dinner in a hurry;
She browned the mutilated side anew,
And put it on the table in a flurry.
Soon as it met his eye, the squire
Exclaimed with wonderment and ire,
"Why, what do you call this, Peg?
Where, where, girl! where is the other leg?"
Peg curtsied and replied, in modest tone,
"An't please you, sir, it never had but one!"
"Only one leg! Where did you buy it, pray?"
"At Parmer Grain's, sir, across the way;
And if to-night, sir, you will go with me,
I'll pledge my life that you shall see
A number of the farmer's geese,
Which, like this bird, have only one a-piece."
"Well, prove it, and that alters quite the case;
But if you don't, mind, you shall lose your place."
He ate his dinner, and began to doubt it;
And grumbled most excessively about it;
The place was brown, like all the rest, he saw;
"Confound it; she surely never ate it raw!"
Evening arrives, Peg puts her bonnet on,
And with her master to the farm is gone;
With expectation big, they softly creep
Where Farmer Grain's geese are fast asleep.
Now to your recollection I would bring,
That when these pretty creatures go to roost
They draw up one leg close beneath their wing,
And stand upon the other like a post.
"There, sir," cries Peg, "now pray cease your pother;
There, sir, there's one; and there, sir, is another!"
"Pooh, nonsense, stuff!" exclaims the squire, "now look ye—
Sh, sh—there, now, they've got on two legs, cookee."
"Aye, sir," cried Peg, "had you said that at home
Noi- you nor I had e'er had cause to roam!
But recollect, sir, ere you think I'm beaten,
You didn't say sh, sh, to the one you've eaten."
But if you don't, mind, you shall lose your place."
He ate his dinner, and began to doubt it;
And grumbled most excessively about it;
The place was brown, like all the rest, he saw;
"Confound it; she surely never ate it raw!"
Evening arrives, Peg puts her bonnet on,
And with her master to the farm is gone;
With expectation big, they softly creep
Where Farmer Grain's geese are fast asleep.
Now to your recollection I would bring,
That when these pretty creatures go to roost
They draw up one leg close beneath their wing,
And stand upon the other like a post.
"There, sir," cries Peg, "now pray cease your pother;
There, sir, there's one; and there, sir, is another!"
"Pooh, nonsense, stuff!" exclaims the squire, "now look ye—
Sh, sh—there, now, they've got on two legs, cookee."
"Aye, sir," cried Peg, "had you said that at home
Noi- you nor I had e'er had cause to roam!
But recollect, sir, ere you think I'm beaten,
You didn't say sh, sh, to the one you've eaten."