Page:Fugitive Poetry 1600-1878.djvu/504
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THE GOUTY MERCHANT.
To see a stagnant pool by way of moat,
To guard the cabin pass;
Besides a pig in mud—or straw about a wad;
Such picturesque additions you may note;
'Tis quite as true—that Catholics go to mass:
With careful steps his Grace had reached the door;
Uprose the pig, astonished at his sight;
A woman almost double swept the floor;
While his Grace asked her—"Could he have a light."
"Your honour shall, with pleasure, sure," says she.
Just then the pig—inquisitive, no doubt,
To know what all this matter was about,
Entered the cabin, to see what he could see,
And rubbed himself against his Grace's knee.
The woman then, with curses loud and long,
Condemned the pig for sideling up so free;
Turned to the Duke and said, "Don't think it wrong
That piggy here
Should enter without fear:
He thinks he has a right—no harm is meant:
Because at the year's end, he pays the rent!"
The Duke was overcome with hearty laughter,
And told the story oft to many after.
He left ten pounds—the woman blessed his sight;
And Piggy long enjoyed his Entry-Right.
To guard the cabin pass;
Besides a pig in mud—or straw about a wad;
Such picturesque additions you may note;
'Tis quite as true—that Catholics go to mass:
With careful steps his Grace had reached the door;
Uprose the pig, astonished at his sight;
A woman almost double swept the floor;
While his Grace asked her—"Could he have a light."
"Your honour shall, with pleasure, sure," says she.
Just then the pig—inquisitive, no doubt,
To know what all this matter was about,
Entered the cabin, to see what he could see,
And rubbed himself against his Grace's knee.
The woman then, with curses loud and long,
Condemned the pig for sideling up so free;
Turned to the Duke and said, "Don't think it wrong
That piggy here
Should enter without fear:
He thinks he has a right—no harm is meant:
Because at the year's end, he pays the rent!"
The Duke was overcome with hearty laughter,
And told the story oft to many after.
He left ten pounds—the woman blessed his sight;
And Piggy long enjoyed his Entry-Right.
The Gouty Merchant and the Stranger.
In Broad Street Buildings, on a winter's night,
Snug by his parlour fire, a gouty wight
Sat all alone, with one hand rubbing
His leg rolled up in fleecy hose,
While t'other held beneath his nose
The Public Ledger, in whose columns grabbing,
He noted all the sales of hops,
Ships, shops, and slops,
Gum, galls and groceries, ginger, gin,
Tar, tallow, turmeric, turpentine, and tin;
When lo! a decent personage in black
Entered, and most politely said,—
"Your footman, sir, has gone his nightly track
To the King's Head,
And left your door ajar, which I
Observed in passing by,
And thought it neighbourly to give you notice."
Snug by his parlour fire, a gouty wight
Sat all alone, with one hand rubbing
His leg rolled up in fleecy hose,
While t'other held beneath his nose
The Public Ledger, in whose columns grabbing,
He noted all the sales of hops,
Ships, shops, and slops,
Gum, galls and groceries, ginger, gin,
Tar, tallow, turmeric, turpentine, and tin;
When lo! a decent personage in black
Entered, and most politely said,—
"Your footman, sir, has gone his nightly track
To the King's Head,
And left your door ajar, which I
Observed in passing by,
And thought it neighbourly to give you notice."